News

Stories below are fake and are made up for your enjoyment, every single part of it is fictional and if you believe it your as dumb as I think you are!

 

11.08.2001 - Murdoc found in possesion of illegal firearms.

Murdoc was arrested yesterday as the police stormed the widely renowned Kong Studios. Five .50-calibre sniper riffles were found within his winebago. Police have yet to comment on the charges.

15.08.2001 - 2D Undergoing surgery to fix eyes

Yesterday the Gorillaz frontman, 2D, underwent surgery to fix his two black holes (where his eyes are supposed to be). 2D reportedly said "I've been thinking about this for some time. Murdoc has been telling me the eyes are the window to your soul and that i'll never meet buddha without them." Murdoc gave us only this comment, "Piss off ya pesky peices of s**t."

21.08.2001 - Kong Studios signs deal with Brittany Spears

Kong Studios have allegedly signed a deal with Brittany Spears and Reamworks. Ms Spears and the Gorillaz are to appear in a horror flick together. Murdoc had this to say: "I'm looking forward to this, i've been having this repeated dream about it and now her time has finally come......."

30.08.2001 - Murdoc a suspect in Brittany Spears disappearance

The police have been questioning the Gorillaz bassist, Murdoc, over the dissappearance of pop sensation Brittany Spears. Spears dissappeared while shooting the new horror flick "Die School Die," by Reamworks.

01.09.2001 - Spears found in Murdoc's Winebago

Brittany was found today in Murdoc's winnebago. Police reported that Murdoc will not be charged as there was nothing suspicious about the activities between Ms Spears and Murdoc. Murdoc had this to say: "She's not that innocent, that's for sure.....well not any more."

05.09.2001 - For the Benifit of Mr Kite

The Gorillaz are set to attend a benifit for Mr Kite with the cream of music's crop. "Were so happy to have this privilidge", a delighted Russel reports.

07.09.2001 - Noodle learns new word

Noodle learnt a new word yesterday. Much to the delight of Murdoc, who's been teaching her a couple of common phrases to get her through concerts. "Scrotum noodle scrotum"! "She says she likes your suit" comments Murdoc.

11.09.2001 - Gorillaz meet the real gorilla's (well sorta)

The Gorillaz had an interesting day today. While filming their new filmclip in the tropics, they met a wild pack of baboons. Russel commented on the situation: "Murdoc thought he'd be a funny pr*ck and got 2D to poke one up the *coughs* ...bum. 2D will be outta hospital soon, so need to worry folks."

18.09.2001 - New Merchandise

Gorillaz launched their new line of merchandise yesterday. Among the new items are a couple of new t-shirts, posters, socks, stuffed toys and strangely enough a line of Gorillaz condoms. Murdoc explained that "theres nothing better than seeing yourself on a condom before a shag, the end result isn't pretty though. I'll be flaunting mine tomorrow if anyone wants to have a squizz *wink wink*."

19.09.2001 - Murdoc Arrested (again)

Murdoc has been arrested for indecent exposure and disorderly behaviour after wearing nothing but a condom down a street in London today. "Nothing wrong with the way satan made me, I'm just spreading his good word, you should try it!"